How to Break Up With Your Girlfriend in a Painless Way

Every relationship comes with its share of ups and downs. However, when a relationship hits a downward spiral for a long time, it can only reach a dead end. A break up is not an overnight decision. Signs of a crumbling relationship are seen way long before the split actually happens. Although both the partners realize the problem, they shun away from recognizing it. This leads to mounting disputes which remain unsolved for a long time, causing the rift between the two to widen. Unresolved differences creates misunderstandings between partners, stretching the fabric of love, faith and trust till it hangs on the weakest thread. Despite the ongoing problems, couples find it difficult to break away and move on with their lives. After all, a break up is an emotionally draining process. So, how to make a break up as painless as possible? Let’s find out…

Making Break Ups Painless

Recognize Problems
A relationship that’s not working smoothly comes to an abrupt end. It is always a relationship which is reeling under pressures of misunderstandings that nears the end. If being together is causing constant unhappiness, fights, stress and depression, there is no point to hang in there. After you’ve made efforts to salvage the relationship, it is time to recognize the root cause of all the problems and act on them immediately. First, accept the problems, analyze your mistakes, introspect to know where your partner went wrong and then point them out to your partner. After this, if the relationship continues to deteriorate, it is time to reason out the breakup, but first, in your mind.

Distance Yourself
If you are clear in your mind that you do not want to be with your partner anymore, start distancing yourself. Make small changes, by allowing yourself and your partner some time away from each other. This way, your partner will also get an idea and the emotional dependency on each other will also reduce. Pursue your hobbies and interests, hang out more with your friends, spend more time with your family and give yourself some time out from the relationship. A painless break up is a result of deliberate effort of moving away from each other. Unless and until, you don’t initiate the distance, the comfort zone of being together despite the issues will never be lost and both of you will be stuck in a limbo.

Give Hints
Instead of dropping a bomb shell, give your partner hints about the break up since the time you’ve decided to part ways. Initiating talks about relationships that fall apart or giving examples of couples who’ve got divorced, will help your partner to understand the resemblance and pattern of a breaking relationship and the relationship both of you share. A sudden news of break up can devastate your partner and make it stressful for everyone around you.

True Reasons
Before you tell your partner, you need to think for yourself, the reasons for breaking up. When a relationship hits a rough patch, we begin to see the negative aspects of our partners and start recognizing traits that cause incompatibility. Thus, make a list of reasons and weigh them out in your head, before you tell your partner anything about the reason. You need to be extremely honest with yourself, while reasoning it out. Break up on the basis of a lie or without giving your partner the real reasons, will never give either one of you a justified closure.

Once you’ve tried salvaging your bond, recognized the problems, distanced yourself emotionally and physically and have reasoned the reasons for breaking up in your mind, it is time to deliver the final talk. Fix a meeting with your partner and make sure both of you have ample of time to talk, as the news is going to stir emotions no matter how much you want the otherwise to happen. Be polite and explain to your partner the reasons why you are breaking up and allow your partner to speak her mind. This way, both of you will get a complete closure and moving on will be a lot easier.

Faith, Fears & Attitude

It’s a matter of choice, not circumstances, how we deal with a particular situation. Our attitude can influence our faith. It’s up to us to influence our decisions today, to make a future we’re dreaming about. Our attitude can change everything. You don’t necessarily have to be the best, but we can make our thinking run in a positive way, to make negative thoughts disappear. You can face anything in this world, if you have a will, strong enough to make you go ahead. We all live in a vicious cycle, but what matters the most is to be able to manage daily something that will add perspectives to our future. You can now take your personal road possible for your dream achieving, or if you are not ready yet to make this step, you have to go through some points, that I will count in a few steps:

1. MOTIVATION

People always needed motivation to face the reality, motivation to move ahead, motivation to overcome challenges, motivation necessary to bring you to success. Motivation makes us handle all the fears , lift your head up and move to your goals. Motivation was always needed when people had a difficult situation in their life, and the influence of the third person was to make him deal with his fears, to find the strength in you, to reach your limits. Motivation makes people be determined, makes them make decisions. But, still – you don’t have to get stocked in the trap of motivation. Sometimes you have to forget about it, and just do it, because some people might use it as an excuse, not to go on. Some people think, I don’t have enough motivation to work. That is an excuse that keeps you where you are. When you start doing the thing, that’s when the motivation comes.

2. TRUST

Trust has always been a skill that people needed to move forward. You need to be 100% sure, or want it so much, to find the trust in you. Some people think their environment does not fit their attitude and goal construction.  They always question themselves – what if? For this you need trust — The trust that you will be able to overcome all the challenges, the trust that you will learn and improve yourself, the trust that you can do it. Then you can look at your life from different views. Who is going to be next to you on the trip to success? — Of course, your family. Family can always be the trust that you need, and the motivation to show yourself that this process of achieving is not long-term.

3. FOCUS

Concentrate yourself on the things you have to do, rather than alarming situations. That is why I keep telling you about the priority list you have to make, to get rid of urgency. After you will get clear with your alarming situations, you can think and focus your attention and attitude on your goal reaching. Remember, that success is a journey, not a destination – All you need is a dream and a date, and focusing on these things make life easier for you. You must build trust and focus on it, with the help of your competence, and character. You will need to prove yourself that you can be an example for your family, first….and then for the others. You have to take things seriously, and if you really decided you are ready enough to move ahead, focus yourself and your attitude to do it!

4. ATTITUDE

Attitude Is everything. This is one of the main principles for personal grow, and achievement. You have to have the right attitude to lead yourself well, to self-manage your emotions, your priorities, you positive thinking, your time, and your personal grow, by living this experience. Yu have to know how to treat yourself, to achieve the maximum potential. The attitude to stay away from different circumstances and challenges is the best way what to start with. People who had disabilities, have had the right attitude and this brought them to success. People had no arms and legs, but they found their talents, and with the right attitude they did it. What excuse do you have to stop in front of the challenges, and complicate yourself, when things are in fact, so simple.

5. RESULTS

To have results, you need to follow all those 4 steps written above, but adding to them daily impact. Let’s say – how would it be like, if you wake up in the morning, and first what you see is your dream book. Give yourself this question? – What do I have to focus on today, to make it come true? What are you going to be tomorrow, you are becoming today. Things that you do day by day, make your future. The decisions you take today, will influence they day you live tomorrow. What you live today, is the result of the decision taken in the past. Doing the right thing daily, will influence on your future, and, depending on your dream size, in 5 to ten years, you will become what you always wanted to. The power Is in your hands, nobody has the right to take the decision instead of you. You can take your life in your hands, and decide for once, that you deserve to live the way you want to live.

Gardening with Young Children